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"Valentine's Day Reflections" by Lisa Adsit

1/28/2015

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The month of February is quickly approaching and with it comes Valentine’s Day. 

Valentine’s Day is one of my favorite days of the year, as it is a very special time to demonstrate love, kindness and thankfulness to family and friends. It is a day to remember those we love. Special sentiments are usually expressed in the form of pink and red hearts, flowers, balloons and candy.

It would seem that the most common symbol of Valentine’s Day are red and pink hearts. Sadly, the day can also be a painful reminder of our very broken hearts after the loss of our very special and precious children. We grieve deeply for them because we love them with all of our heart and soul. Our loss and intense grief is simply an expression of the love that we have for our children.  

“Grief is the last act of love we have to give to those we loved.  Where there is deep grief, there was great love” 

(I saw this quote on someone’s Facebook page).

On this day we can reflect on the past Valentine memories we might have with them, but that can be hard and may bring with it great sadness. We know that Valentine’s Day will never be the way it was for us when our children were here. 

As the day approaches, it brings me comfort to reflect on the love that God has for me. I believe that He is with me and is walking with me as I travel along this painful journey. His love fills my heart. He is guiding me and giving me the strength, courage and encouragement to make it through each day.  I feel Kayla alongside me too, always a part of me, always in my heart.  

I hope that by remembering that God is with you that it can bring you some sense of comfort and peace. God’s love and grace is available to us anytime, anywhere. He will help us and guide us. He will continue to give us the strength and encouragement we need to face every heart breaking moment the rest of our days.  

May we each remember and be comforted this Valentine’s Day by God’s love. May we continue to demonstrate love for one another and try to celebrate the special day not in sadness but in loving memory of our children. 

“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.”  -Mother Teresa   

May we all find comfort on Valentine’s Day as we remember our beautiful children and know that God loves us and is with us.  

"For God so loVed the world
That He gA
ve
His onL
y
BegottE
n 
SoN
ThaT whosoever
Believes 
In Him
Shall 
Not perish,
But have 
Everlasting life”

With Love,
Lisa Adsit, "a mom like you"
Fort Collins, CO 


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"Taking Off the Garment of Grief"

1/25/2015

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"You have breast cancer," said my Oncologist, when she called to give me the results
of the pathology report of 3 lymph nodes that were removed this past week.

Diagnosed and treated for Stage 3 breast cancer from 2009 to 2012 was such an ordeal; a mastectomy, chemo theraphy, 3 breast reconstructive breast surgeries, not something that anyone wants to repeat, but now I must wait to see what's next, after I meet with the Oncologist for her prognosis and proposed treatment plan.

As soon as I heard that I have breast cancer, a thought immediately came to my mind that "It's time for me to take off the garment of grief!"  Sorrow and stress has certainly taken it's toll on my heart, soul, mind and body, and I'm not surprised that my immune system has been compromised over the years. 

Though I know that it is God who gives "beauty for ashes, joy for mourning and praise for the spirit of heaviness" (Isaiah 61:3), I also know after years of grieving, I must do my part in taking off the "garment of grief" that can become like a sackcloth of ashes over those who hurt and grieve.

Hearing the words "breast cancer" is an opportunity and a call for me to once again acknowledge the sovereignty of our God and also yet another time for God to show me His mercies that are "new every morning," that He might give me His strength to face what may be ahead of me.

Since receiving the news of the pathology report, I have heard Father God, the voice of truth, telling me that I am not the sum of my sorrows, disappointments or trials. That I belong to Him and that "this is for My glory, do not be afraid," and I am not afraid. Actually, when faced with trials such as this, I am thankful that my gift of faith kicks in and I find myself reaffirming my faith, hope and trust in God alone.  

God's Word tells us that we are all "flowers quickly fading,"  and before this ole' gal fades away, I stand at the beginning of yet another challenge by renewing my commitment to live free,  to make a difference in the lives of others, to tell people about the eternal love of God as displayed in the redeeming sacrifice of His Son Jesus Christ!  

God is the breath in my lungs, and I belong to Him. Today, I proclaim with courage and conviction that I am blessed. And, because I know that I am a "daughter of the King," I am taking off the "garment of grief," that I might fully receive the "spirit of triumphant joy and praise!"  

Gratitude Changes Everything,
Angie "a mom like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.amotherlikeme.info





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Missing You with Hope!

1/8/2015

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In two days, January 10th will mark 13 years since our son, Kevin, headed off to Heaven.


As I look back on the past 13 years, I can hardly believe it's been that long chronologically, but in some ways it feels like yesterday.

Time is a funny thing isn't it?  It tics it's steady beating no matter what is going on in our lives . . .  tic-toc, tic-toc, tic-toc.  



Sometimes, when I am quiet and still, I can feel the slow, steady rythym of time. At other times, I am not even aware of the tic-tocs of time until the hour, day, week, month or year has passed, and as I continue to age, I realize that time really is "fleeting."

This also seems to be what it is like for me in missing Kevin.  As I think of him, remember him and miss him, sometimes time seems to stand still. Other times, like today,  I cannot believe that so much time has passed since he was here with us.

I have heard, as you have probably heard, that "time heals all wounds."  For some this may be true, but for me, I have found that time does't heal anything at all and wounds can fester and sorrow not embraced or attened to can actually deepen the wounds and even cripple us.

For me, I believe that it is only God Himself who heals all wounds just as He promises in Isaiah 61:3 that "He gives beauty for ashes, joy for mourning and praise for the spirit of heaviness..."

Today, just two days before the 13th year that marks the day our son headed off to Heaven, I am missing him.  Though I miss him now with a lesser degree of sorrow, pain and suffering, I miss him and I know that I will always miss him and that's okay. I know that it is normal to miss him and others I have loved who have gone on before me. I also know that it's okay for me to long to see him and the others I love and am missing.

After nearly 13 years, I can look back on my journey through grief with the knowledge that I have turned a corner and that all my wounds are healing. I also know that Kevin and I are not separated by anything other than time and our addresses and

"I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  Romans 8:38-39


Because of the love of God and His priceless gift of redemption and eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord, my love for Kevin and his love for me goes on and on and on, and as of January 10th, I will now be 13 years closer to seeing him again!  

With Faith, Hope and Love,
Angie "a mom like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.motherslikeme@facebook.com


COMMENTS:
Angie, I love reading your precious words, as you write your feelings to us that understand. We know what you feel in your mothers heart. We miss our children and always will. Some days it seems so long since Donna went to heaven, others it seems so fresh and I miss her; days I cry and days I just look @ her picture and think of how pretty she was, other days are just average days, but I am so grateful for the blood of Jesus making it possible to see her again for all Eternity. It has been 17 years this past Nov. 7th, and like you I am 17 years nearer to seeing her again and my baby boy, Victor Allen (thanks to you, he has a name now) and I think with all that is going on in our world, we are near the return of our Lord, for sure we are closer than we were yesterday.
 Love you and I will pray for you and Bob, on this 13th anniversary.
 Doris Lamberson

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"Shoring-Up Courage for the New Year"

1/2/2015

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Growing up close to the beach was a very special blessing for this Arkansas-born and East Coast young girl. 

Times spent in the sun (or on foggy days), sand and in the salt water and waves helped to make me the person that I am today, and this photo and quote really spoke to my heart this morning, as I consider what oceans I may cross in 2015.

Countless times I have stood on the shore looking out at the vastness of the ocean (Atlantic and Pacific) imagining the mighty and powerful God who not only designed and created the ocean, but is its' master. 


One of my nephew's reactions, when he first saw the ocean as a little fella is a special memory, when he said  "Mommy, where's the drain for that BIG water?" The ocean can make us feel so small and it's kind of scary isn't it?

It is no surprise that I married a handsome, tanned "surfer boy," and that our three sons surfed. We spent hours and hours and hours at the beach through the years we lived in Southern California, and I've got the sun-damaged skin to prove it. 

However, there came a time in my life, when I began to spend little or no time at the beach and the only time I got in the water was when my children and grandchildren were young. When I was a young girl and younger woman, I enjoyed body surfing and playing in the waves. At one point, I began to dislike the sand and became aware of the "big water," and I now realize that I just lost interest in the ocean and I also lost a measure of courage that had once allowed me to leave the shore.  

To me, courage is being willing (even when we don't feel able)  to "lose sight of the shore" in order to cross an ocean. Quite often those of us who suffer great sorrow and loss become shore huggers, because we are afraid of what might be out there in the unknown, perhaps because of what lies behind us or the pain and suffering that has affected our balance and courage for really living again.

What would it mean for you to "lose sight of the shore" that you might experience something greater and more powerful than you have yet to experience? Are you afraid of losing sight or letting go of what lies behind? Are you content to stay on the shore? Have you lost courage for living a life that would include leaving the "shore" somehow?

Relocating to the Rocky Mountain region in Northern Colorado has helped me understand that the shoreline of life is wherever we are living or in our hearts and minds. For me, it is important and that I be aware that I may become a "shore hugger," if I do not keep my eyes and heart focused on the One who is the master of the oceans, storms and seasons of my life. 

I've been knocked down many times, when I have tried to leave the shore and venture out into the ocean literally and figuratively throughout my life. As I look ahead to 2015, I believe that it is time for me to imagine myself losing sight of the shore and being willing to cross an ocean, if I am going to live the life that God has planned for me. I have become cautious, careful and may lack the courage that I once possessed, because I have been hurt, but I'm ready to begin again with renewed courage.

Does any of what I am sharing resonate with you, as you look out over the "big water" of the unknown?

With Faith, Hope and Courage in Christ ALWAYS,
Angie "a mother like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.amotherliikeme.info



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    These blog pages are written by and for moms who have suffered the loss of a child.

    May the reflections and expressions of mothers' hearts be a source of comfort, help and encouragement and may you, like these moms, accept God's great exchange as "He gives beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, praise for the spirit of heaviness . . " Isaiah 61:3

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