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"Freedom!"

6/28/2014

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“I’m Free! I’m Free!,” shouted the actor in the movie that my husband, Bob, and I were watching with our young sons.

I cannot recall the title of the movie or the actor’s name, but I vividly remember our then 3-year old son, David, leaning into me and shouting with much excitement, “Mommy! Mommy! He’s three just like me!”   



As July 4th is a few days away, I consider the blessings of living free in this Country, and I also consider how often I have perhaps misunderstood or misused these liberties and freedoms, not intentionally, but because I have taken them for granted somehow.  My toddler son, David, thought he heard the word "three," when the actual word was "free."  At the time, I found David's misunderstanding of the word to be precious and amusing, and it is now a special memory for us both. But, as I think back on this sweet memory, I realize that there was also a lesson to be learned, that I must be careful to understand the true meaning of freedom. 

For me, to live free is to be at peace with God; free from the "wages of sin, which is death," which certainly refers to physical death, but also spiritual death of spirit that can happen in my daily life, as well as in reference to eternity. Living free cannot be bought or bargained for and it requires that I acknowledge, accept and embrace the sovereignty and blessings of God/

I believe that freedom is a gift paid for in blood by those who have layed down their lives for freedom and liberty, and that the greatest gift of freedom has been given through the blood sacrifice of Jesus Christ, our Redeemer King at the Cross.

"I'm FREE! I'm FREE!" Hallelujah, AMEN!

Living in the Freedom of Christ,  
Angie "a mom like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.amotherlikeme.info







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"The Epic Lover Challenge"

6/26/2014

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Our son, David, recently created the "Epic Lover Challenge" for men who are considering marriage or are husbands.  This "challenge" could change the hearts and lives of husbands and wives and if "mama's happy, everyone's happy" right?

Please feel free to share this "challenge" with your husband and other men that you know who are striving to be the best husband they can; Christ-like role models for their family and their "band of brothers."

I am so proud of our sons, David and Eric, as they are truly "tender warriors" who are doing their best to love their wives, as "Christ loves the church."



THE “EPIC LOVER” CHALLENGE - David R. Green

Protect Her Heart
Never ever take your woman for granted. Love her fully. Fiercely protect her heart. Never stop courting and dating her. Never get lazy in your love.

Protect Your Heart
Guard your heart. Protect that place in your heart where no one should enter or reside except your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in. Refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

Fall in Love Over and Over and Over Again
Change will come. People change, circumstances change. Re-choose your woman each and everyday.
Fight to win and keep her love just as you did, when you were choosing and courting her.

Always See the Best in Her
Focus only on what you love about your woman. Focus to the point where you no longer see anything but love 
and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to have this woman as your own

It’s Not Your Job to Change or Fix Her
Your job is to love her with no expectations of her ever changing. Love who she is, as she is, whether or not she is who you thought she was, when you fell in love with her the first time

Take Full Responsibility for Your Emotions
It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy. You are responsible for making your own happiness and by doing so, your joy will spill over into your relationship with her.

Never Blame Your Wife for Your Feelings and Actions
If you get frustrated or angry at her, consider what might be triggering something inside you. Don’t react, take time to look within and to understand what is tapping into a place of pride or roundedness. Take full responsibility for those childhood wounds that need redemptive healing.

Allow Your Woman to Be A Woman
Seek to understand and fully connect to her femininity, feelings, thoughts and emotions. Listen to her with your heart not your head. Don’t move away from her emotions, be present and strong, and let her know that you are not going anywhere. Hold and comfort her.

Be Silly
Play with the girl inside the woman. Laugh and make her laugh. Don’t be too serious. Enjoy simple pleasures. A good sense of humor and laughter makes things easier.

Fill Her Soul Everyday
Learn her love language and the specifics about what makes her feel beautiful, important, valuable and cherished. Make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a “Queen!”

Be Fully Present
Give her not only time, but your complete attention. Do whatever it takes to clear your head and your schedule so that when you are with her, you are fully and completely “with” her. Treat her as your most valuable asset and/or client - because she is!

Be Willing to Take Her Sexually
Carry her away in the power of your masculine presence. Consume her and devour her with your strength, penetrate her very being. Move her toward a place of melting in feminine softness, as she is able to trust you with her soul.

Don’t Be An Idiot
You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too many or the same ones over and over again. Learn from the mistakes you make. You are not perfect. She’s not perfect. But, try not to be stupid.

Give Her Space
Encourage and nurture her need to have time for herself. Let her fly from your arms and sight that she might experience something of what she needs that will feed her feminine soul and spirit. Let her go to feel a sense of freedom from serving and doing - let her be who she is as a woman not just a married woman, mother, etc. She will return to you with renewed love, joy and passion.

Be Vulnerable
You don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your feelings, your hopes and your fears. Be willing to have your woman truly see you.

Be Transparent
If you want your wife to trust you, you must be open and honest and willing to share EVERYTHING - especially those things you may not want to share or are afraid to share. It takes wisdom and courage to love openly and completely - let her in. Take off the mask - be real.

Don’t Worry About Money - Be A Good Steward
Find ways to work together as a team. Figure out ways to leverage each others strengths and weakness concerning your finances. Be thankful for what you have, forget about what you don’t have. Focus on needs rather than wants. Manage your money as a team, don’t try to control it.

Never Stop Growing Together
“A stagnant pond breeds disease, a flowing stream is always fresh and cool.” Keep your love “fresh and cool.” Find and focus on common dreams, visions and goals - see one another as partners and best friends.

Forgive and Live Free
Be slow to anger and quick to forgive (letting go of anger, hurt and bad feelings). Focus on the present and your future together. To forgive is to live free. Always choose freedom. Lay down and let go of the burden and weight of the past. 

Always Choose Love - ALWAYS Choose LOVE!
To love should be the guiding principle for marriage. “Love is not jealous, it does not seek it’s own way” . . . and love will endure and last, for “love never fails.” 


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"Bending in the Storms"

6/26/2014

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That I may be " . . . like a tree firmly planted by streams of water. Which yields its fruit in its season . . . " Psalm 1:3

This week we experienced a severe Colorado thunderstorm. The storm began with an unusual stillness in the air that is often a foretelling that "something is coming!" 





As  I was closing our bedroom windows, I heard the rustling of leaves and noticed that one of the trees outside was bent over almost halfway to the ground. 

Though I could not hear the sound of wind, it was obvious that this tree was being affected by the wind. Soon, the sounds of strong, whirling winds, ping-pong sized hail and crashing thunder surrounded our house. My husband, Bob, was sound asleep (which amazed me) and I woke him up with an urgent "Honey, get up! We may have to go down to the basement."

For the next hour or so, we held watch together. I walked through every room in the house waiting and watching. We listened to the emergency radio broadcast updates of "flashflood and severe thunderstorms" warnings and precautionary instructions. Most of the thunderstorms that we experience here in No. Colorado are like a weather show, but this storm was different and I was afraid.

The storm passed almost as quickly as it hit, and we headed back to bed for the night. Bob went to sleep immediately, I lay there for awhile listening to the distant thunder, and I began thinking about that tree outside the window, how it had bent over in the wind, and I wondered if it had survived the storm.  

The next morning, Bob and I walked around our home checking for damage and I was glad to see that all of our trees and plants had survived the storm; the only visible damage were leaves and twigs on the ground - a simple clean-up this time.  

This storm was a good reminder for me that we never know what's ahead and that as my brother-in-law says, "we live on a beautiful, but dangerous planet." It was also a reminder that like all of God's creation, He has created us to survive the storms of life by bending to His will rather than resisting and fighting His will and purpose in our lives. 

The robins and doves that roost around our home are active and singing again, and the weather is calm. I know there will be more extreme weather brought to our area by Summer storms, and I also know that there will be more "storms of life" ahead.

I am thankful for God's reminder through the example of the tree outside the window that He has designed us, His people, to bend to His will and plan for our lives. I am also reminded of the importance of being deeply rooted in His Holy Word and in an intimate relationship with Him through Christ Jesus our Lord and King. 

Bending and Yielding,
Angie "a mom like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.amotherlikeme.info



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"Guard Your Heart"

6/20/2014

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I too often have trouble with my heart attitudes . . .  "Why can't you just do a heart transplant that I might have a heart like Your's, Father God?"

Though I know that God can do anything and He could change my heart in an instant, I also know that is not His way to do so, because of His gift of free will, which means that I must be open and allow Him to change my heart, as only He can.

He knows that my  "heart's desire" 
is that I will love Him with all my "heart, soul, mind and strength" and "others more than myself." How I long for a heart like Jesus, to be a person willing to "lay down my life" for my family and friends and even a stranger, if necessary.

He also knows all the reasons that my heart isn't more like Jesus' heart and a heart change can only happen with careful examination and revelations through testings in my life that turn up the light on the dim, dusty and dark places yet to be redeemed and transformed by Him alone.




I am always thankful for the times in my life, when I realize that my heart attitudes simply fall short. Usually, my shortfalls are the result of doing things my way, rather than His way, and also because I get too relaxed and even lazy about "guarding my heart."  But, I am grateful that my Father God doesn't let me go for too long without Him reminding me of my need of Him, His Word and His Holy Spirit in my life.


Funny how we can so easily fool ourselves into thinking that we've arrived at some higher level of spiritual maturity and holiness, forgetting that we are by nature sinners and that we all "fall short of the glory of God."  Left to our own understanding and good works, it has been my personal experience time after time that I just come up short-sighted and missing the mark.

My heart is wounded and scarred from disappointments, heartache, betrayals, loss and what our son, Kevin, often said that "life will get 'ya!" Don't we all get caught up in life as we know it, and find that because we have not safeguarded our heart against the temptations, struggles and hardships and indulgences of this life that we allow anger, judgement, envy, jealousy, hatred, fear and bitterness to take up residency in our heart?

This Presidential campaign is bringing up the issue of my needing further and continuing "heart surgery" by God . . . and so I remind myself that He is "the only One to bring out the miracle" and appropriate judgement(s) and all I can do is align myself with His will and purpose and leave the rest to Him . . .  I keep hearing Him say, "Be still and know that I AM God!"

Perhaps, in these current testings the truth of what God is teaching me will settle more deeply in my heart . . .
"Please God, help me to "guard my heart," and protect and preserve that place where you are heart of my heart!"


So wanting a heart like YOU, Jesus,
Angie  "a mom like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.amotherlikeme.info








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"Too Busy to Grieve"

6/20/2014

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A common response to loss is to  "get busy," with the idea that being busy will somehow ease the pain and keep sorrow away.  Unfortunately, increasing activity 
and getting busy is often used as a distraction to avoid the truth that "I hurt."

Early in my grieving the loss of my youngest son, Kevin, I was intentional about grieving openly, honestly and HARD!  After a couple of years of intense grieving, it seemed to me that grief was taking hold of my life in a way that was preventing me from really living, and I decided it was time for me to "get on with my life." 


As I "picked myself up and brushed myself off," as the old saying goes, I realized that I had no idea how to begin again.
I began a prayerful search for meaning and purpose, spending much of my time and attention on learning all that I could about grief and how it affects our heart, soul, mind and body. I also spent countless hours in prayer, beseeching God to show me the way out of the "shadows of death" into His glorious light once again.

I have read a plethara of books written by insightful bereavement professionals. I have connected and companioned with hundreds of "moms like me" through co-founding Mothers Like Me Comfort Ministry, and I have journeyed and journalled my way through God's Word. Through my prayerful searchings, I have learned some very important truths about myself, and about grief and loss. One of the most important lessons I have learned is that though grieving is painful, is it absolutely necessary. 

My journey through grief with God, my family, friends and other "moms like me," has helped me to move out of the shadows of death into the light of Christ with renewed faith, hope and love. This morning, as I pen my feelings, thoughts and impressions of my journey so far, I thank God that He has brought me out of the shadows, through the pain, and into a place of rest and renewal. I also now know that no matter how "I keep myself busy with things to do, everytime I pause, I still think of YOU (my precious son)," and I will grieve. 


"We grieve because we love." -Unknown

With Faith, Hope and Love, 

Angie "a mom like you"
amotherlikeme@gmail.com
www.amotherlikeme.info


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    These blog pages are written by and for moms who have suffered the loss of a child.

    May the reflections and expressions of mothers' hearts be a source of comfort, help and encouragement and may you, like these moms, accept God's great exchange as "He gives beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, praise for the spirit of heaviness . . " Isaiah 61:3

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