I too often have trouble with my heart attitudes . . . "Why can't you just do a heart transplant that I might have a heart like Your's, Father God?"
Though I know that God can do anything and He could change my heart in an instant, I also know that is not His way to do so, because of His gift of free will, which means that I must be open and allow Him to change my heart, as only He can.
He knows that my "heart's desire" is that I will love Him with all my "heart, soul, mind and strength" and "others more than myself." How I long for a heart like Jesus, to be a person willing to "lay down my life" for my family and friends and even a stranger, if necessary.
He also knows all the reasons that my heart isn't more like Jesus' heart and a heart change can only happen with careful examination and revelations through testings in my life that turn up the light on the dim, dusty and dark places yet to be redeemed and transformed by Him alone.
I am always thankful for the times in my life, when I realize that my heart attitudes simply fall short. Usually, my shortfalls are the result of doing things my way, rather than His way, and also because I get too relaxed and even lazy about "guarding my heart." But, I am grateful that my Father God doesn't let me go for too long without Him reminding me of my need of Him, His Word and His Holy Spirit in my life.
Funny how we can so easily fool ourselves into thinking that we've arrived at some higher level of spiritual maturity and holiness, forgetting that we are by nature sinners and that we all "fall short of the glory of God." Left to our own understanding and good works, it has been my personal experience time after time that I just come up short-sighted and missing the mark.
My heart is wounded and scarred from disappointments, heartache, betrayals, loss and what our son, Kevin, often said that "life will get 'ya!" Don't we all get caught up in life as we know it, and find that because we have not safeguarded our heart against the temptations, struggles and hardships and indulgences of this life that we allow anger, judgement, envy, jealousy, hatred, fear and bitterness to take up residency in our heart?
This Presidential campaign is bringing up the issue of my needing further and continuing "heart surgery" by God . . . and so I remind myself that He is "the only One to bring out the miracle" and appropriate judgement(s) and all I can do is align myself with His will and purpose and leave the rest to Him . . . I keep hearing Him say, "Be still and know that I AM God!"
Perhaps, in these current testings the truth of what God is teaching me will settle more deeply in my heart . . .
"Please God, help me to "guard my heart," and protect and preserve that place where you are heart of my heart!"
So wanting a heart like YOU, Jesus,
Angie "a mom like you"