"Those who think there is a TIME LIMIT when GRIEVING . have never lost a piece of their heart!" -Unknown
As I am only 2 days into grieving the death of my beloved brother, Russ, AND, I am still grieving our youngest son, Kevin, who's been gone from us for 16 years, AND, I still miss often grieve the loss of my Dad who died 58 years ago, when I was 12 years old, I know firsthand that there is absolutely no "time limit" when grieving.
I also know that if we do our grieving, not denying our sorrow and heartache, giving ourselves permission to feel the sorrow and disapointment of the loss of those we love, the intensity of our grief lightens in frequency and intensity.
Grieving loss is needed and we must connect to our loss and allow ourselves to grieve whenever our heart, soul, mind and body needs to grieve . . . I call this "grief relief." The process of letting go, of not fighting against the feelings of sorrow and pain, which would be similar to holding our breath . . . we MUST allow ourselves the relief of grief that we might be able to JUST BREATHE.
Realizing how important my brother has been in my lifeand that we were like "two peas in a pod," and he is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh, I can't imagine doing life without him and that brings me great distress and sorrow. I know that there will be no time in my life, when I will get used to living with this broken piece of my heart that has gone on to Heaven with him.
I will not try to rise above my grief, because I have learned that doesn't change anything, except it prevents me from healing and learning how to live with my loss in a healthy way, experiencing God's healing peace. Trying to be strong, to not embrace the pain of loss is simply silly - it goes against our God-given design to feel and to love. And, I give God the broken pieces of my heart assured that His loving hands will mend them together in His time. I have peace in knowing that He will knit these broken places together again, making my heart stronger and more loving in the process. I know this is true, because I have experienced in response to the deaths of my Dad and my youngest son, my step-sister and many other people who I have loved and enjoyed who are no longer here with me . . . and I know God will heal my heart once again!
Giving myself all the time that I need to grieve,
Angie "a mom like you"