Our son, David, recently created the "Epic Lover Challenge" for men who are considering marriage or are husbands. This "challenge" could change the hearts and lives of husbands and wives and if "mama's happy, everyone's happy" right?
Please feel free to share this "challenge" with your husband and other men that you know who are striving to be the best husband they can; Christ-like role models for their family and their "band of brothers."
I am so proud of our sons, David and Eric, as they are truly "tender warriors" who are doing their best to love their wives, as "Christ loves the church."
THE “EPIC LOVER” CHALLENGE - David R. Green
Protect Her Heart
Never ever take your woman for granted. Love her fully. Fiercely protect her heart. Never stop courting and dating her. Never get lazy in your love.
Protect Your Heart
Guard your heart. Protect that place in your heart where no one should enter or reside except your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in. Refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
Fall in Love Over and Over and Over Again
Change will come. People change, circumstances change. Re-choose your woman each and everyday.
Fight to win and keep her love just as you did, when you were choosing and courting her.
Always See the Best in Her
Focus only on what you love about your woman. Focus to the point where you no longer see anything but love
and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to have this woman as your own
It’s Not Your Job to Change or Fix Her
Your job is to love her with no expectations of her ever changing. Love who she is, as she is, whether or not she is who you thought she was, when you fell in love with her the first time
Take Full Responsibility for Your Emotions
It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy. You are responsible for making your own happiness and by doing so, your joy will spill over into your relationship with her.
Never Blame Your Wife for Your Feelings and Actions
If you get frustrated or angry at her, consider what might be triggering something inside you. Don’t react, take time to look within and to understand what is tapping into a place of pride or roundedness. Take full responsibility for those childhood wounds that need redemptive healing.
Allow Your Woman to Be A Woman
Seek to understand and fully connect to her femininity, feelings, thoughts and emotions. Listen to her with your heart not your head. Don’t move away from her emotions, be present and strong, and let her know that you are not going anywhere. Hold and comfort her.
Be Silly
Play with the girl inside the woman. Laugh and make her laugh. Don’t be too serious. Enjoy simple pleasures. A good sense of humor and laughter makes things easier.
Fill Her Soul Everyday
Learn her love language and the specifics about what makes her feel beautiful, important, valuable and cherished. Make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a “Queen!”
Be Fully Present
Give her not only time, but your complete attention. Do whatever it takes to clear your head and your schedule so that when you are with her, you are fully and completely “with” her. Treat her as your most valuable asset and/or client - because she is!
Be Willing to Take Her Sexually
Carry her away in the power of your masculine presence. Consume her and devour her with your strength, penetrate her very being. Move her toward a place of melting in feminine softness, as she is able to trust you with her soul.
Don’t Be An Idiot
You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too many or the same ones over and over again. Learn from the mistakes you make. You are not perfect. She’s not perfect. But, try not to be stupid.
Give Her Space
Encourage and nurture her need to have time for herself. Let her fly from your arms and sight that she might experience something of what she needs that will feed her feminine soul and spirit. Let her go to feel a sense of freedom from serving and doing - let her be who she is as a woman not just a married woman, mother, etc. She will return to you with renewed love, joy and passion.
Be Vulnerable
You don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your feelings, your hopes and your fears. Be willing to have your woman truly see you.
Be Transparent
If you want your wife to trust you, you must be open and honest and willing to share EVERYTHING - especially those things you may not want to share or are afraid to share. It takes wisdom and courage to love openly and completely - let her in. Take off the mask - be real.
Don’t Worry About Money - Be A Good Steward
Find ways to work together as a team. Figure out ways to leverage each others strengths and weakness concerning your finances. Be thankful for what you have, forget about what you don’t have. Focus on needs rather than wants. Manage your money as a team, don’t try to control it.
Never Stop Growing Together
“A stagnant pond breeds disease, a flowing stream is always fresh and cool.” Keep your love “fresh and cool.” Find and focus on common dreams, visions and goals - see one another as partners and best friends.
Forgive and Live Free
Be slow to anger and quick to forgive (letting go of anger, hurt and bad feelings). Focus on the present and your future together. To forgive is to live free. Always choose freedom. Lay down and let go of the burden and weight of the past.
Always Choose Love - ALWAYS Choose LOVE!
To love should be the guiding principle for marriage. “Love is not jealous, it does not seek it’s own way” . . . and love will endure and last, for “love never fails.”
Please feel free to share this "challenge" with your husband and other men that you know who are striving to be the best husband they can; Christ-like role models for their family and their "band of brothers."
I am so proud of our sons, David and Eric, as they are truly "tender warriors" who are doing their best to love their wives, as "Christ loves the church."
THE “EPIC LOVER” CHALLENGE - David R. Green
Protect Her Heart
Never ever take your woman for granted. Love her fully. Fiercely protect her heart. Never stop courting and dating her. Never get lazy in your love.
Protect Your Heart
Guard your heart. Protect that place in your heart where no one should enter or reside except your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in. Refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
Fall in Love Over and Over and Over Again
Change will come. People change, circumstances change. Re-choose your woman each and everyday.
Fight to win and keep her love just as you did, when you were choosing and courting her.
Always See the Best in Her
Focus only on what you love about your woman. Focus to the point where you no longer see anything but love
and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to have this woman as your own
It’s Not Your Job to Change or Fix Her
Your job is to love her with no expectations of her ever changing. Love who she is, as she is, whether or not she is who you thought she was, when you fell in love with her the first time
Take Full Responsibility for Your Emotions
It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy. You are responsible for making your own happiness and by doing so, your joy will spill over into your relationship with her.
Never Blame Your Wife for Your Feelings and Actions
If you get frustrated or angry at her, consider what might be triggering something inside you. Don’t react, take time to look within and to understand what is tapping into a place of pride or roundedness. Take full responsibility for those childhood wounds that need redemptive healing.
Allow Your Woman to Be A Woman
Seek to understand and fully connect to her femininity, feelings, thoughts and emotions. Listen to her with your heart not your head. Don’t move away from her emotions, be present and strong, and let her know that you are not going anywhere. Hold and comfort her.
Be Silly
Play with the girl inside the woman. Laugh and make her laugh. Don’t be too serious. Enjoy simple pleasures. A good sense of humor and laughter makes things easier.
Fill Her Soul Everyday
Learn her love language and the specifics about what makes her feel beautiful, important, valuable and cherished. Make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a “Queen!”
Be Fully Present
Give her not only time, but your complete attention. Do whatever it takes to clear your head and your schedule so that when you are with her, you are fully and completely “with” her. Treat her as your most valuable asset and/or client - because she is!
Be Willing to Take Her Sexually
Carry her away in the power of your masculine presence. Consume her and devour her with your strength, penetrate her very being. Move her toward a place of melting in feminine softness, as she is able to trust you with her soul.
Don’t Be An Idiot
You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too many or the same ones over and over again. Learn from the mistakes you make. You are not perfect. She’s not perfect. But, try not to be stupid.
Give Her Space
Encourage and nurture her need to have time for herself. Let her fly from your arms and sight that she might experience something of what she needs that will feed her feminine soul and spirit. Let her go to feel a sense of freedom from serving and doing - let her be who she is as a woman not just a married woman, mother, etc. She will return to you with renewed love, joy and passion.
Be Vulnerable
You don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your feelings, your hopes and your fears. Be willing to have your woman truly see you.
Be Transparent
If you want your wife to trust you, you must be open and honest and willing to share EVERYTHING - especially those things you may not want to share or are afraid to share. It takes wisdom and courage to love openly and completely - let her in. Take off the mask - be real.
Don’t Worry About Money - Be A Good Steward
Find ways to work together as a team. Figure out ways to leverage each others strengths and weakness concerning your finances. Be thankful for what you have, forget about what you don’t have. Focus on needs rather than wants. Manage your money as a team, don’t try to control it.
Never Stop Growing Together
“A stagnant pond breeds disease, a flowing stream is always fresh and cool.” Keep your love “fresh and cool.” Find and focus on common dreams, visions and goals - see one another as partners and best friends.
Forgive and Live Free
Be slow to anger and quick to forgive (letting go of anger, hurt and bad feelings). Focus on the present and your future together. To forgive is to live free. Always choose freedom. Lay down and let go of the burden and weight of the past.
Always Choose Love - ALWAYS Choose LOVE!
To love should be the guiding principle for marriage. “Love is not jealous, it does not seek it’s own way” . . . and love will endure and last, for “love never fails.”
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