I have never been a journaler. Yet, when our son, Ryan, died 8 yrs ago, I picked up a blank book and began to write. I found myself able to express my thoughts and feelings, as if talking to Ryan.
Journal entry: "We are still a family. There is such a void now. We look at each other and know. nothing will ever be right again without you here with us. You were "us". We were "you". Who are we now? We don't know. God, please help us know how to be "us" without "him".
You wonder, are your thoughts and feelings normal? Or are you going crazy? I didn't have a job to get back to. My family was desperately hurting. We clung to each other and to our faith and began the trek through the wilderness of our grief. Each one of us had our own trail to navigate. Once in a while our paths would meet and we would mourn together, but much of our journey has been personal to each one of us. Just as we each had a special relationship with Ryan such is our grief journey.
Fourteen months into my journey I met another "mother like me" A beautiful, caring, grieving mother who walked with me along the path I was on. A companion. Our hearts were knit together in a way that only this path would take us.
I was blessed to have the love and support of my family, many friends, our church and our community and I knew that I wanted to comfort others with the comfort God had provided for me. 2 Cor. 1:3,4
In the fall of 20I4, I was invited to become involved in a vision for our community. That dream was for a non-profit Grief Center that would be available for children, teens and adults grieving the loss of someone they too had loved. Today, that dream is a reality. The Community Grief Center in Greeley officially opened in August of 2016 and is currently running 8 programs to come alongside children, teens and adults and help them better understand their grief and know that they are not alone.
When you lose a child there are so many "whys" and so few answers. It has helped me continue to heal, as
I have been privileged to come alongside other Moms just like me.
Who am I now? I am Ryan's mother. I am also Jamie and Candace's mother and Jeff's wife. Still. Always. Forever.
For more information about The Community Grief Center please go to www.communitygriefcenter.org
or call Christy Weeks "a mom like you," @ 970 381 6869.
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