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A Miserable Day to End All Miserable Days!

3/28/2019

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Thinking back on that "miserable day to end all miserable days," when our son, Kevin, died  - I've recently had some new thoughts about that day. 

I've been through some wicked awful days in my life where it's been difficult to enjoy anything good, and that brutal day, when I suffered the loss of our son, sometimes runs through my memories like a bad movie.

When I think of misery, I have an image of falling over in intense pain, holding my head in my hands and sobbing - completely overwhelmed. 


For moms like me, it is not difficult to understand my memory of that "miserable day," but others might say "it's just one day, surely you will get over it!" 

To grieving moms I ask, "Is that likely to happen?" and we would all agree, "It's not likely," but possible.


Though the memories of that brutal and miserable day may fade, and those memories coming to our minds become less frequent, they are still held in our mind and no amount of time can change this reality.

As I recall those memories now that my broken heart is healing and the intense pain has subsided, I have to say that day is not the most "miserable day to end all miserable days." In truth, the most "miserable" day to end all miserable days" is the day that Jesus was crucified, and He forever bears the scars of His suffering and pain that far outweigh any misery I have or could ever experience. All sin, sorrow, suffering, misery and brutality was placed upon Him for our sake, that we might be forgiven, saved, redeemed and given the free gift of Eternal Life. 

Because of His misery, and what He accomplished for our sake, my personal most miserable day takes me to the Cross where Jesus, "a man of sorrow, acquainted with grief" gave His life that all who receive Him, as the Redeeming King, might live eternally.  

Our son, Kevin, accepted this truth when he was a young boy, and whenever memories come of the "miserable and brutal" day when he left us, I think of him being resurrected, like Jesus, from death to life in an instant, and I lay down my memories at the Cross with gratitude for what Jesus has done!


May this be a blessed Easter for everyone. -John 3:16

With Faith, Hope and Love in  Christ,
Angie "a mom like you"
www.amotherlikeme.info
amotherlikeme@gmail.com

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"Living Through Wounds"

3/21/2019

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​My husband and I went out of town for a week and while away, I got in a "fight with a recliner."  What?  How can that be?  Well, it's simple really.

I was sitting in a reclincer where the footstool has to be pushed down with one's legs so it wil lock in place, and this
 footstool would not lock, and so I kept pushing and pushing and pushing until I severely sprained my right ankle and knee.

After a trip to Emergency and xrays, I been immobile for more than I week,

During this time, I have had a LOT of time to think, pray and reflect (as well as watching way too many movies), and I realize that this downtime is something I needed even more than the week's vacation.

Being injured and wounded has reminded me of how injuries and wounds can take a toll not only on our body, but on our heart, soul and mind, as well. 

Being injured, wounded and afflicted with pain, I am also reminded of the wounds and the scars I bare from the injury of loss and grief, especially the loss of our son, Kevin. No matter how many years pass from the time of the injury, the wounds and scars are still still with me, and I am learning how to not only live with the woundedness, but living through the wounds. 

I have found that the more I "open myself to being healed, the more I discover how deep my wounds are. The search for true healing will be a suffering search, Many tears still need to be shed.The great challenge is living through the wounds instead of thinking them through. The choice we face is whether we are taking the hurts to our head or to our heart. In our head we can analyze them, find their causes and consequences. But no final healing is likely to come from that source. We need to let our wounds go down into our heart, then we can live them through and discover that they wil not destroy us. Our heart is greater than our wounds." -Henri Nouwen, "The Inner Voice of Love."

As I limp along, somewhat crippled from my injury, I feel the pain, discomfort and frustration of not being able to live my normal life, and I am reminded that like the grief that injured me after Kevin's death, I must continue to let go of the need to be in control of my pain and "trust in the healing power of my heart," but mostly the comfort from our Heavenly parent.

How about you, preciuis Mom? Are you being gentle with yourself, learning to live through your woundedness with your heart, and the comfort from our loving Heavenly parent?  I pray so, oh how I pray so!

With Love and Blessings,
Angie "a mom like you"
www.amotherlikeme.info
amotherlikeme@gmail.com





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What Travels Well on the Journey Through Grief?

3/2/2019

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I fill my home with the sounds of soothing, encouraging and inspiring Christian music everday. I have been doing this since I was a child, because music is the language of my soul, and I want my home filled with music that draws me closer to God and keeps the enemy away . . . Satan won't stay anywhere that is filled with God's spirit, the Word, and prayers and music that praises and worships Him.

I also do this to drown out the sounds of the world, and so that the music will travel with me throughout the day and into the night.

This morning I heard a song by the group "Out of the Gray" that spoke of what "travels well" in life and into our Eternal life, and I thought of how the words to that song speaks so well about what we need to travel with us on our journey through grief . . . "peace, hope and love" travel well, and I would also add "faith."

My journey through grief began when I was 12 years old after the loss of my Dad. As I approach the 1st year since my "little brother" travelled home to God on March 13th, I sense the heaviness of the sadness that I so often experience, as I live with the significant and life-changing loss of my Dad, my son and now my brother. As I continue to live with these losses, I think of how each of them "travelled well" into Eternity leaving behind a measure of the "peace, love, hope and faith"  that travlled with them, 

I also think of how travelling with these essentials myself doesn't make this journey easier, but possible. A focus on travelling with peace with God and others, hope for healing and better days ahead, love for and from others, and a faith that sustains and strengthens me are certainly vital essentials for me.


Making the necessary and painful journey through grief can be a life-changing journey and I have found the changes in me to be a much improvement in who I am as a person, as I have tried to focus on travelling with "peace, hope, love and faith."

My loved ones "travelled" well in this life and into the next, as did our blessed Savior Jesus Christ; my examples of excellent travellers indeed.

How about you?  What travels with you, as you make your way through the journey of grief? Are there burdens that you need to lay down, as you seek peace, hope, love and faith for the journey?

With Peace, Hope and Love,

Angie, "a mom like you"
www.amotherlikeme.info
amotherlikeme@gmail.com




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    These blog pages are written by and for moms who have suffered the loss of a child.

    May the reflections and expressions of mothers' hearts be a source of comfort, help and encouragement and may you, like these moms, accept God's great exchange as "He gives beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, praise for the spirit of heaviness . . " Isaiah 61:3

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